Friday, August 24, 2012

I was worthless today...

OK, you know when you reach that point where you've said "screw it", and lost all initiative? I think I reached it today. Much like Peter in Office Space (and no hypnosis necessary!), I came to the realization that I just don't care. I did a perfunctory attempt at the job, so it can be said that I actually did try to try, but the "screw it" motif permeated the atmosphere like a low-hanging fog bank. I'm not sure if all the refusals I received were a result, or if the people were planning to shoot me down anyway, but it was a fruitless effort today. Tomorrow, I travel to Dripping Springs, to ply my trade there. It's about an hour away. Let's see how that turns out. Sometimes when I say "screw it", doors open and magical success occurs. Other times, I say "screw it", and it gets screwed. I do place it in the hands of The Almighty and let the chips fall where they may.
I do hate to let apathy be a driving force in my life, and I question the notion that apathy is a driving force at all. Who's ever driven by apathy? Perhaps it's more of a "cruise control", but even on cruise control, the driver still has to steer, and avoid other drivers and sundry road hazards. But, note that I'm not apathetic about my life and my goals; merely apathetic about this particular job. I think I'll look for something else; as I stated before, I might have to carry plates. As I absolutely loathe waiting tables, I have to pick the least sucky (in my mind) option. I rule out Denny's and IHOP. I also don't think I can handle the "awesomely excellent" chain tavern genre, like Chili's and Applebee's. Someplace I can wear my own clothes and not feel like a total dweeb. There should be a few of these kinda "hipster-type" places; this being Austin, after all.  This chapter of The Shoehead Chronicles sure is fraught with uncertainty. Meanwhile, I'm practicing saying "More iced tea, sir?" without having a complete meltdown...


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